Goals

I like to fantasize about setting goals, mapping out steps to accomplish them, being aware of my progress the entire way, and achieving success at the end, at which point I can celebrate in a way that I choose.

Notice key words in the above paragraph "fantasize about."I struggle with goals. Sometimes the first part is the hardest: setting a goal. Or even before that, identifying a goal to set. What is the right goal to set? Once you set one goal, you eliminate other possibilities. This is limiting. Once a goal is decided upon, you must decide what steps are necessary to reach a point at which you can consider the goal achieved. How do you define whether your goal is achieved or not? With me, I tend to think of too many goals, and then proceed to fail in the following ways:

1. I fail to decide on one (or even a few) goals to focus on
2. I fail to define what degree of the goal is possible for me to achieve
3. I fail to set a deadline by which I would like the goal to be achieved
4. I fail to determine a reasonable time period sufficient to allow for necessary steps to be completed to lead to goal accomplishment

This results in me feeling scattered and overwhelmed all of the time.

I came across this article: the best goal is no goal which says that the whole system of goals is designed for failure.

I can't say I've tried hard enough to decide on, set, plan actions and achieve my goals. I think I achieve lots of things without setting goals, but I should track what I do with my time and record the things I achieve so that I don't hate myself.

Pancakes

I went to CVS this evening to buy syrup, milk, and a coke, as I didn't feel like driving all the way to Kroger. The syrup was for some waffles which have been sitting in the freezer for a week now, uneaten because we have no syrup. The milk is because we've been out for some time. I planned on drinking the coke with my dinner tonight, which was to be some tacos from the restaurant behind my house. The store was out of milk, so I stood in line with just two items, the syrup and coke.

While standing in the ridiculously long line, I noticed a guy from Georgia State School of Music (from which I graduated just one year ago) walk in the door. This is the guy who had the facilities job, and was responsible for scheduling student recitals in the recital hall. I remember having big gripes about this guy. He was impossible to get in touch with. You had to literally stalk him in order to get your recital scheduled. I would wait just around the corner of the music building to catch him walking out to lunch. Many times I knocked on his office door to no answer. One time, I decided to call his office while standing outside the door. He answered. "You're in your office?" I said. "I just knocked." Tonight in CVS I looked at him to see if I could tell if he recognized me. He really did not seem to. Oh well. I never had any meaningful conversation with him after all.

When I made it up to the counter with my syrup and coke, the cashier man said "Pancakes for dinner?" "And Coke!" I replied with a laugh. "Really?" He said, "Well the pancakes part is good. It's always a good time for pancakes." "But not really, though." I said. "Oh, it's for tomorrow?"

On my way out, a guy decided to use my ear for a complaint. He said "it might be good if they gave you coupons for things you actually wanted to get with the coupon." I smiled and nodded, continuing to walk to my car. "Oh look, I got a coupon for ear drops, just what I needed!" He said, as we parted ways.

Killing Time

Today I had some time to kill. I was picking up my mom from work at 7:15, but it was only 6:30. I ended up going into some outlet stores. First I went into Aldo. Lately I've been thinking I should get some REAL new shoes, not shoes from a thrift store. I walked around, perusing. I hate going into stores where retail people are lurking. I don't want to have to talk to anyone. The guy in Aldo was okay though. He said hello. Then he said "just hangin out?" I said "yeah, actually I'm kind of killing time right now." He said "cool. Hey, that's what I'm doing too." I said "you're getting paid, though." Not too bad. There weren't any shoes of interest, and I left.

Next I went into American Eagle. I walked around, avoiding people, and realized I was not interested in anything they had. I decided I'd brave Bath and Body Works and see if I could get excited by some lip gloss. Indeed I could. Buy two, get one free. I picked up fruit punch, whipped vanilla, and blueberry preserves. No one bothered me. The lady who checked me out asked for my phone number. I said "no thanks." Then she asked for my email. I gave her the same reply. Nice!